Fifty Shades Darker

darker

IF YOU HAPPENED to catch last year’s Fifty Shades of Grey by accident, you’d be forgiven for thinking it was a documentary about the mating rituals of two pieces of semi-horny driftwood. But even though the sex haustingly dull big-screen adaptation of E.L. James’ best-selling book series was meh’d by critics—and despite the fact that costars Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan looked as though they’d rather snort live yellow-jackets than work together again—the movie made more than half a billion dollars worldwide, meaning a sequel was bound to come.

So! Here’s your trailer for Fifty Shades Darker, the adaptation of the second book in James’ Shades trilogy, and a movie that apparently features lots of heated glances. In fact, there’s so much looky-looing in this trailer, they could have named it Fifty Shades 2: I’ll Take the Stares. Anastasia Steele (Johnson) stares lovingly, and then somewhat accusingly, at her ex(?)-beau, the smolder-smirking Christian Grey (Dornan). Meanwhile, Christian stares not only at Johnson, but also at the mysterious Elena Lincoln (Kim Basinger)—who, in return, stares at him from behind a masquerade-ball mask. There’s also some fireworks, a sopping-wet make-out session, and lots of vague, foreboding dialogue, like, “No rules, no punishments, and no more secrets,” which was also a rejected tagline for Jean-Claude Van Damme’s Double Team.

Darker, which is directed by series newcomer James Foley (Fear,Glengarry Glen Ross), continues the unprecedented, boundary-breaking trajectory that James’ stories have enjoyed since 2009, when the first Shades installment was published as a piece ofTwilight fan fiction. After subsequent entries got a favorable online response, James reworked the titles into what would become the Fifty Shades series—first as ebooks and print-on-demand titles, then as a chart-topping paperback series (even though many privacy-minded thrill-seekers opted to check it on their Kindles). Now, it’s evolved into a line of sex toys, an accidental meme-spawner, and, finally, a major movie franchise—albeit one that will need to up the thrills a bit in order to appeal beyond the books’ loyal fan base. Will newbies get in to Fifty Shades Darker? We’ll find out when it opens on Feb. 10, 2017.